Note: there are some audio issues in this recording. I tried to fix them the best I could. You can read more details in the show notes. There are a few missing words here and there.
Sheridan: I am so excited to welcome Maile our podcast today.
And I’m just going to go ahead and we’re going to jump right in if you want to introduce yourself and then I’ll ask you some questions and we’ll go from there.
Meet Maile and learn a bit about her 8 births
Maile: I’m a mom of 8 kids from age seven down to one. Let’s say we spent about your married life out in New Jersey, our first four kids, and then moved back to Utah in between having our fourth and fifth.
Sheridan: And. I love it. Like to start out with just the question. How did you find out about the gift of giving.
Maile: I might’ve heard one of your names in conjunction with Hypnobabies and then found the connection to the gift of giving life. I don’t remember exactly, but somehow I found out about it and got the book and just ate it up.
I have read the book over a few times. Like some of my pregnancies I’ve read every single article in order and like check them off. As I went and read every single page in other pregnancies, I’ve just kind of like looked at the table of contents and. Articles that felt like they were really what I needed at the time.
And so it’s been a huge part of my birth experiences starting with probably my third or fourth pregnancy, but I can’t remember how I first heard about it, but
Sheridan: I love what you shared about how you’ve used it through different pregnancies. And that was really interesting. And I think a lot of people do that.
And that is one great thing about it is you can really just read parts that jump out at you and still is great. So why don’t you share how the book has helped you in your pregnancies or birth
Feeling the presence of another baby
Maile: That’s a big question because it’s helped me in a lot of ways. I mean, just there’s so many of the stories that resonated so deeply with me and with different parts of, sorry, I’m getting like a little emotional, just thinking of these different birth experiences.
So for instance, I know one of the stories talked about like feeling the presence of another child who was supposed to join their family. And that wasn’t something they were, if I remember the story correctly, it wasn’t something they were thinking about about having another one, but they just felt the presence of this other spirit in their home.
And I think even the parent who was writing the story, talked about like, feeling like there was someone missing and going, looking for them or something to that effect. And that really resonated deeply with me because after my. Pregnancy. It was my most challenging pregnancy by far. I had had some health complications that made it, so I was just really uncomfortable.
And really my body just was not handling pregnancy as well as it had in the past. So I was done like after number five, I told my husband, I am done, done. Like, I can’t do that again. That was so hard. And then I had, where is so vivid? I was birthing a baby and I, like, I literally felt the baby being birthed from me during the.
And it was a little boy and it just was so vivid. And later I was like, was that just like a crazy dream? Or was that like a revelatory dream? And I heard some people doing research down at BYU on whether dreams are revelatory or not. And one of the markers that they said kind of indicates that. revelatory is if you feel something with your spiritual senses, that we have senses as well as spiritual senses.
And so if you feel some kind of, , you know, what you would think is like, oh, I felt something like, I felt him being born. That that is more or lends towards it being a revelatory one way it could point to that. But to read. other people having had those kinds of experiences where they felt some kind of is another spirit wanting to join.
Their family really helped me to be like, okay, maybe that was real. Maybe that wasn’t just an actual indication of communication that heavenly father was trying to give me about someone else who. , child number six, that I was so sure it would be that boy was a girl, child number seven, who was like, okay, here’s the boy that I dreamed of girl.
And it took till five for eight. I was, I was relieved and excited. I, we love our girls and wouldn’t change them for anything but to finally get that boy. Um, what’s kind of a relief.
Sheridan: Yeah. Yeah. Oh, thank you. I love that. I love that. Is there another time or is there anything else you’d like to share, about having had a spiritual experience in pregnancy or birth or mothering?
How Maile’s 5th Pregnancy helped her better appreciate the Atonement of Jesus Christ.
Maile: Yes. For one thing I mentioned my son, Sam was the one that my fifth pregnancy and the one that was the hardest, , for those reasons. And it was. during it that I felt like, I really came to appreciate Jesus’ sacrifice for us on a
deeper level. I’m honestly really blessed with pregnancies that have not been that challenging except for his.
And so for that pregnancy to feel like,
to really feel the weight of the sacrifice of what I was doing for my child and to similar to our Savior, how our Savior. didn’t do something to make his body better. He did not go through performing the atonement, his body, those do not get stretched and everything that happens during labor and birth, it’s not to improve upon our bodies, but it’s a sacrifice that we’re willing to make, to have our bodies changed in order to give somebody something they can’t provide on their own, a physical body.
And so to me, like I just came to know our Savior. In a way that I never had before to think he did this for us. Like he did it out of love. He did it because he was completely willing to go through all those hardships for his body to give us what we couldn’t gain on our own. And so I really appreciated that opportunity through that pregnancy to experience that and to have that added understanding of the atonement of our Savior.
Covid Uncertainty led Maile to choose her first homebirth for her 8th baby
So that was one. And then I wanted to also talk quickly about in my last child’s birth, we had decided to have a home birth. It was in the middle of COVID and I had never had a home birth before. I’d had really amazing births, some in a hospital, some in birth center. And I always felt like I was pretty much the experience I wanted, even in a hospital setting.
I always kind of liked the idea of hospital for some of my other births you know, in case something happened that I’d be close to medical care. My last baby, John, in the midst of COVID and the uncertainty of the regulations that would be in place in a hospital. And would they make me wear a mask while I was in labor?
Or would they take the baby away? If I had a positive COVID test, just all of that uncertainty, I just decided, you know what, I just, I’m just going to have the baby at home. So I don’t have to worry about. But I was nervous. Like I, I did have some fears and my husband had some concerns about a home birth and what the, what ifs of home. But I felt really peaceful about it. And I have this such a strong belief in the power of women’s intuition to know what’s right for them and their each individual birth. I mean, every one of my birds have been really, really different, but each time I’ve been able to, tap into the inspiration of the spirit to know what is the best.
The power of affirmations in preparing for her homebirth
For this particular birth. And so I felt comfortable moving forward with the home birth, but I still had those hesitations and or concerns. And so I went through the process of spiritual creation where I spent time like visualizing myself in birth, like everything going well, everything going smoothly, the labor progressing well, the baby being born in a healthy, easy way.
I wrote out these affirmations that I taped on my bathroom mirror and would see in practice every day. And there were things like I am safe giving birth to my baby. I will have angels surrounding me and helping his birth to go smoothly and different things like that. And so between those two practices and then continuing to use hypnosis.
Which has helped me be like, so calm, so relaxed, listening to affirmations that like reminded me was what to do. It knows how to burn and once the birth, actually, I just, it was just so amazing how, like, everything I practiced through that process of spiritual creation absolutely then happened in the physical creation of the birth.
Like I was so relaxed, everything went smoothly. I think the midwife got here to my house and I think she saw how relaxed I was, which partly is because of him. No babies. More relaxed on the outside when I’m using Hypno babies, then what may be happening internally. But she saw me in the tub when she got here and she kind of, she was, she had a really good poker face.
So I didn’t know, she thought this, but later she told me she saw me in how relaxed and calm I was. And she just thought hmm I think we’re going to be here a while. And my oldest daughter wanted to be woken up. If I had the baby in the night, she wanted to be. And all of a sudden I told my husband, I was like, go get Kaia.
And, um, the midwife in her head was like, I don’t think they need to wake her up yet. Like, she’s going to be here for awhile. But, um, they got Kai up. She came in and literally within minutes, John was born and, It was just so beautiful. And I know not all births go that way and not all, not every time that we work to spiritually create something.
The power of spiritual creation
I know it doesn’t always happen exactly like we want and that’s okay. Like that’s part of life too, but it was such an empowering experience for me to be able to say, wow, I have this vision. I have this, what I wanted, what I hoped would be accomplished.
And by putting like my mental and spiritual energy towards that and visualizing and creating it.
Like it just came out so beautifully. I never did that, that intentionally for any of my other birds. So it took till my eighth to really decide, to try to create something that intentionally, and it was really beautiful. And then after my husband, We should’ve had all the babies at home.
Oh, wow. Thank you.
Sheridan: There’s so much that I love about both of those experiences that you shared. And I think especially that last one where you talk about like spiritually creating it ahead of time and like really intentionally thinking about what is it that I want and focusing on that and creating affirmations about that to help create it and the power that our mind has in doing that. So I’ve really loved that you had that experience and I also find it, you know? Yeah. I kind of chuckled when you’re like, oh, it took us till our eighth baby to, to, for me to try that, you know, but that’s very, that’s
Maile: wonderful. Yeah. And the affirmations were so helpful because then, you know, when my mind would do what minds naturally do.
And during the course of the day, when one of the fears would pop-up of what if this. Those because I’d been practicing those affirmations. It was so easy for them to just instantly come into my brain as something positive to focus on. Instead of dwelling on the fears and the negative side, I could just be like, no, I am safe giving birth my baby.
And so it was really helpful. like throughout my days too, Oh,
Affirmation tips
Sheridan: that’s great. Can you just tell me a little bit more, like some of your tips with affirmations? Like what really helped you said, I think you posted some on your wall. Just share a little bit more like any
tips you have.
Maile: I mean, I’ve heard of affirmations in the past and sometimes like when you hear of affirmations that other people can give you, like, I really felt like I had to pick the affirmations that felt like they’ve resonated for me.
And so I just spend a little bit of time just sitting down with the paper. Start with the words I am, you know, the savior said he is the great I am. So when we copied that pattern of saying, I am so like, the spirit is ready and willing to step in and get ideas of what we need to affirm in ourselves at any given time, I just kind of sat down and wrote that and then sort of just let myself be in some quiet for a few minutes to see what would come up to the surface.
And then I just, whatever came to mind. I wrote down on this paper. , and one of my hobbies, I mean, I have a lot of kids, so I don’t have a lot of free time. So one of my favorite hobbies is just practicing hand lettering because it’s something I can do while writing it to do list. Or while, you know, just in the midst of my daily life, I can just practice some doodling and hand lettering for fun.
So I just sat down with one of my pens that I like to hand letter with and just kind of made it a little bit prettier. It wasn’t anything spectacular, but just something a little bit fun. And so every time I looked at it, like I spent this few minutes doing something that was really soul for me and then just taped it on my bathroom mirror.
So I think it was just like, I’m just saving my head. Like to me saying them out loud is great, but I found a lot of power of just saying in side my head..
I love that. Thank you. And I think it is so true when we practice our affirmations, even if it is in our head, because that’s where we’re going to reply to the negative thoughts is in our head with the affirmation.
And it does just smoothly come when it’s something that we’ve practiced saying the positive, then when those negative or the fears pop up, those positives are, you’re like, oh no, I know the right one to say for this instance. So. That’s really great. I would love to know if you could give advice to a young woman just starting out her mothering journey, what would it be?
Trust that God will help you parent your children
Okay. That’s an awesome question. I can look back and remember, I mean, it’s been 17 years out of being like a first time mom and I think the primary thing I would say is God cares a lot about this process of bringing spirits into the world. It’s not for the faint of heart. As I now have teenagers.
And recently we were having one of those struggle moments with one of them turned to my husband after our child would walk, how are we going to survive eight teenagers?
And they’re wonderful. And them growing into the people that they are, but it’s, it’s challenging at times. Motherhood will stretch you and grow. You didn’t even know you needed, and that God is there for the journey. Like he will not leave you alone in this process of raising his children, because these are children of our heavenly parents as well.
And so we will not be left alone in this work. And we are entitled as one of the spiritual leaders of our home in conjunction with our partner. If we have a partner doing this with, or on our own, like he is. Promptings when we need them in like little subtle nudges. And I know like as women, we are busy and we have so many things to do.
And so many people needing our attention, but we don’t always have like the hours to sit down and ponder and meditate and search scripture is clear to me that, that my heart lungs face, but it’s not a reality for my life right now. And so I have that, like, God comes up to us in the moments, whether it’s making.
decisions about pregnancy birth or making their kids get older. And we have questions that we’re like, we don’t know what the right answer is that have this absolute undeniable conviction that God shows up for us in all of those moments. As soon as we ask for help, we can feel the promptings of what we need to do and what, what will be best for us in our family.
Sheridan: Yes. Thank you. I think that is true. It’s like our intuition and like relying on God and you’re right. It’s it is. I mean, sometimes we maybe do need to sit and like study something out or pray extra hard, but I think also God can be there in that. You know, like your child comes to you with something that’s big and you’re not prepared for it.
And you can just say, Heavenly Father help me. What do I say? What do I do? And he can tell you in that moment what to do. And for me, usually, Be quiet. Like just listen, you know, at least with my older kids or I often will try and be like, yeah, what do I do? And God often is like, just love them. And I’m like, really?
Cause I feel like I should do something a lot more than that. So, and again, that’s more with my older kids when they were younger. I did feel like there was more I could do, you know, but as they’re teenagers, especially older teenagers, and now I have adult children, it really is like, listen and love. And like, that’s all you can do now.
I’m like, dang. It, it was kind of nice when they were little and I could do a lot more, but it’s okay. I really appreciated what you shared there. That is very powerful. Well, thank you so much. Maile for coming today. And talking to us and sharing your experiences as an experienced mother of eight children and especially your insights into the affirmations and how that helped you with this last birth and spiritually creating it first.
So thank you.
Maile: Well, thank you for giving me the opportunity. It was a pleasure to get, to reflect the on these things.
Sheridan: Thanks for joining us today. If you have an experience that you want to share about the spirituality of pregnancy or birth, please contact us. We love having guests on the podcast, or if you prefer to just write up your experience, we are happy to share it on our blog or an Instagram.
And also please share the podcast with your friends. This is how the word gets out. That birth and pregnancy can be spiritual. The podcast. And our book is one of the greatest ways to share that as well. As of course you sharing your experiences with the. Visit the gift of giving life.com. Currently our newsletter subscribers get free access to our online class, which is growing.
And if you want more inspiration, of course, you can always buy the gift of giving life on Amazon, either for yourself, or it makes a great gift for any woman, you know, have a great week and know that you are loved.
